Friday, July 13, 2007

Supergirl #19

Supergirl #19
This title has been soooooo unbelievably bad since Joe Kelley took over, so I'm very glad that he's leaving it. That said...

...nope, it's still bad. In fact, this book gets a well-deserved rating of ASS from me.

Seriously!

What the hell's up with that stupid headband that makes Kara look like she's wearing a dead animal on her head? And come on, folks! She's not really 16, she just looks like she is. In actuality, she's older than Superman! So what's with all of this "jailbait" business? And since when does United States law apply in such a fashion to aliens? Whose psychology and physiology is markedly different from that of humans? That's just stupid. And sure, this issue tries to hang a lantern on it, but it doesn't go far enough: what's with all the pseudo-metaphysical technobabble elitism? Just shut up and write dialogue that makes some fucking sense! Not just gobbledygook designed to fill space! This issue also tries to tie together every single storyline since the beginning of the series, which is problematic, because in real time, many of those stories occurred more than a year ago, and even if we did remember them, they were so bad that why would we actually care? Most of what I really remember from the Kandor storyline is Kara getting skeevy with someone who looked just like Clark. Yuck! And are people really stupid enough to think that they can punch Kara without hurting her?

Tony Bedard comes on next issue, thankfully. Unfortunately, next issue is an Amazons Attack crossover, a storyline so stupid in concept and execution that I can't believe that it's being written by Will Pfeifer. It seriously reads like a Dan Didiogasm. And then the following issue is a Countdown crossover which tries to sell the idea that Karate Kid would ever be a worthy opponent for Supergirl. Puhleeze! One punch and he's down! No question! He's got zero powers! Who's coming up with these stupid ideas? And I'm pretty much done with reading the stupidity that is Countdown. I really can't stand it. So, I probably won't read the next two issues. But at least the preview images of Renato Guedes' vision of Supergirl make her look like a real person!

I still can't believe that this tripe isn't yet on the chopping block, yet Manhunter was constantly being threatened with cancellation, as are Atom and Blue Beetle. What the hell is wrong with people that they'll be more consistent in buying crap than the good stuff?

You wanna know what absolutely pisses me off the MOST about this issue? Take a look at the solicitation:
"Superstar writer Joe Kelly concludes his SUPERGIRL run with a grueling fight between Supergirl and Superman! Is the only way to save the universe to kill the Man of Steel?"
Are they talking about the same issue here? Superman doesn't even appear in this issue until the last three pages, nor in costume until the final splash page, and they HUG on the penultimate page! WHAT THE FUCK? Even the title is captioned: "The Death of Superman Again!" What the hell?!? It has Kara straddling the "corpse" of Superman! Double what the hell?!?

ASS.

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